29 Weeks

I went to my final specialist appointment today. Big waste of time, but I suppose it was important to go. I am allowed to start running, if I can, as long as I don't fall, he says. That's good news at least. And a lump that has been bothering me is only scar tissue, so that's good news too.

Somehow, minutes before I was supposed to leave for the appointment, I hurt my back. I could barely walk, and driving was probably not the smartest idea. As soon as I got home, I took the rest of my left over morphine tablets, and went to bed. Seems I might be here for a few days now though. What is UP with me? Drama seems to follow me wherever I go. This is excruciating too. I think I may have hurt myself because I have been trying to catch up on the last 6 months without a decent work-out. I did a large number of sit-ups yesterday, and I must have not used proper form. At least it feels muscular, and not more sciatic. Hopefully all I need is a good sleep since I have so much to do around here! I am still catching up on properly cleaning the house, and the blinds and walls are in desperate need of a clean. I also have 4 loads of un-folded laundry!

Other than my failing body, I got the call I have been waiting for! I am booked in for the pain clinic! I'm so happy. I once again cried after I got the call. But it's so sad to get the call and have them ask you if you still want an appointment, like you might be over your little wussy hissy-fit bout of pain? They know it's been months, and maybe some people are ok now? I just get so angry at the drug addicts clogging the system for people who really need to see the pain specialists. Some people are waiting for more than a year. I have waited about 6 months. I was just thinking about how bad the pain was in the beginning. And it's awful to think, but I know I would not have been able to live with that pain for this long. I was already thinking of ways to get myself re-admitted to the hospital by the time I found some meds which helped me. What did they do before modern medicine? I know I couldn't live a life like the one I was living. It was torture.

All in all, foot / ankle / leg is healing. It kind of reminds me of what it's like when you take your car in for a tune up, and you have to get used to all the new feelings and noises. My ankle cracks differently than it used to, and my muscles feel different too, where the break was. It's like having a new leg to get to know. Nerve pain is also changing again. I am way less sensitive now, and the burning feeling is coming back. It feels like when you come inside after playing in the snow.

My physio is going well, I am balancing on my tippy-toes, and I got to 20 seconds one day! The heel raises are hit or miss. Sometimes I am so sore from a work-out / physio the day earlier, that I can't lift myself up onto my tippy-toes on the bad side. The acute pain is pretty much gone, except for the odd time, and I have taken the ski-boot off (ie, it felt like I was wearing a ski boot on my bad side)! I can now walk down the stairs almost normally, and not need the handrail. I can walk on the flat road normally! Downhill is still an issue, but getting better. Knee to wall is consistently 4-5cm. I still have hit or miss days, but it still feels like I am making progress.